Three weeks have passed, and this is the best I can do...

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12月28日

Three weeks have passed, and this is the best I can do...

I tell you, I try and I try to be semi-normal, and it just never seems to work out. Case in point:

Cell phones. Specifically, cell phones that allow me to take photos AND send text-messages. In other words: my own cell phone.

A couple of weeks ago, while I was watching my outstandingly beautiful and intelligent goddaughter Silly-Lily-Billy-Goat, I was fascinated by the details of a high-speed chase that were being delivered to me via a police scanner in her mama's kitchen. It was most exciting, what with speeds of 110 mph, wild lane-changes, talk of stop-sticks, and -- holy crap! -- it was all heading down the highway toward TinyTown!!

Immediately, I parked my ass on the sofa and began my mass-text to those I knew would share my excitement: Husband and Sons 3 and 4. Belatedly, I added #1 Son.

I gave them the essentials: high-speed chase down Hwy. 14, 110 mph, coming toward town, then the stop sticks, which resulted in the car losing a tire and an eventual surrender.

Here were the responses from the recipients, word-for-word:

Husband: No! Are you alright? I'm on my way.

#3: Oh.

#4: Quit bugging me in school!

Following is the exchange I had with #1 Son, word-for-word:

He: What are you talking about?

Me: There was a high-speed chase down Hwy 14, at speeds of 110 mph. The cops blew his tire off w/ stopsticks. Were the words too big for you, or what? (Impatient, because he's NOT APPRECIATING THE EXCITEMENT.)

He: Well what the hell you told me 110 and then that he lost his tire. You watch enough courttv i figured you were excited about that (Note his inappropriate use of punctuation and capitalization. Shameful.)

Me: No, first I said 'high-speed chase on Hwy. 14 East.' THEN the rest. And you KNOW I lost my beloved Court TV, so thanks for opening THAT old wound. (Bastards at Dish TV!)

He: You never said that you sent me a picture you crackhead (The respect simply oozes from him.)

Me: (???)

Me: She's cute, though, isn't she? (Playing the Lily card [the picture I'd inadvertently sent him], desperate now to save face. Obviously.)

He: Yes but shes no high speed chase (Always the comedian. Snot.)

And Husband? He actually did think I was the one involved in the high-speed chase. As the chasee.

I give up.

21:58 | 写入日志

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	David发表: How our past informs the opinions of those around us! Felons, they reason, will be felons. I can't believe you would watch Court TV even if you had it - holy yuck. Why not just go to the sleaziest part of town and observe events? These reactions from the near and dear seem to point to a certain crying of "Wolf!". Have we been alerting the close relatives to a few too many events utterly untrelated to their lives? Oh dear, I sound just like them, don't I? It sounds like high speed chases will reamin a solitary pleasure for you - or you could move to LA where, I hear, they bring life to a halt as the city rushes to watch. 1 月 4 日
	kflJean发表: I love this.. my mom can't do her phone, either! I keep trying to teach her, but I finally think since she can make calls and answer it, I'll just do everything else for her!LOL I'm with P.. the best one was.. quit bugging me in school.. and does hubby just think you go out and get involved in high speed chases for fun??hahaha Maybe it would be fun! I'm just glad you're blogging again.. I worry about you, sometimes. I hope 2008 is a much better year for you! hugs, jean 1 月 4 日
	S.Stephanie发表: I get the feeling that son #4 would have sent that very same text, even IF you were part of the chase. lol I love the fact that your hubby just assumed that you were. Those are some skills you have there Kay, texting while being involved in a chase of up to 110 mph! You ARE GOOD! LOL BIG HUGS, Steph 1 月 3 日
	meg发表: Husbands- always think the best of us, don't they? A guid New Year to ane an' a' and mony may ye see! 1 月 1 日
	akwoman 发表: Kay, it is sure good to see you again and hear the escapades of tiny town and your phone. I do not know how to use mine all that well either, much to the dismay of my two teens. Luckily one is off to college and does not have the endure the embarrassment. Good to see you 1 月 1 日
	Sher 发表: Hiya Kay - Happy New Year! I have missed you :) 1 月 1 日
	mousesuzy发表: HAPPY NEW YEAR from the wicked wench and the wishy-washy wizard. LOL.. man, i LOVE yer kids...but only coz they are YOURS and not MINE! (mine are much worse, btw) 12 月 31 日
	Litespreader发表: As usual, you crack me up! Man, I needed a laugh right now. It's almost midnite, and I have no one to wish me an end to my happy birthday, or kiss a new year's kiss... well, I have my beautiful, sleeping granddaughter.. but we're going to keep her that way. I hear the fireworks.. it's a new beginning. Kay, I hope you have a fantastic 2008! I hope you keep bringing us the laughs, and tears, that only you can bring. love,t 12 月 31 日
	g发表: Texting? What's that. Oh, that's the stuff $900 cell phone bills are made of until the phone company catches up with your request to change your plan! You are ahead of me, Kay. Btw, are you ever home? hugs, g 12 月 31 日
	P发表: i wish that you and your family would film a sit com. you know, the one that actually made me laugh the most was "quit bugging me in school." oh kay. you are the best funny in town. (i wonder what reason your husband used for your involvement in a high speed chase. do you think he thought YOU were being chased? or the one doing the chasing?) 12 月 29 日

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